Life with the Legends
by Operative18
Summary: Takes place between Season 1 finale and Season 2 premiere. The Legends continue on with their daily lives on board the Waverider and try not to mess things up. Hopefully, they all survive each other before they accidentally blow the ship up.
1. Business as Usual

"Gideon, scan the timeline for any potential aberrations." Rip ordered as he climbed into the Waverider. The rest of the Legends followed behind, confused by the captain's calm demeanor.

"Uh, not to be the one to state the obvious, but are we just gonna ignore the guy who crash landed in the same ship as ours?" Sara stared at Rip, and the rest of the team got to the bridge with the rest of them.

"Yes, well, that same man did disappear into thin air. So, yes, Ms Lance, for the time being, we will ignore it. Until it proves that we need to face this again at some point." Rip began tapping on Gideon's interface, trying to detect time anomalies.

"Forgive me for saying so, but a man from the future with the Waverider in his possession and none of us aboard seems a bit hard to ignore. Given that he also warned us against going to 1942, an era that could be fraught with time aberrations." Professor Stein chimed in, giving off his usual spiel.

"And as you are not a Time-Master, former or otherwise, take it from me. The best course of action is to ignore this Mr Tyler's disappearance, and simply not travel to 1942. That way, we can all be assured of everything going well." Rip blurted out, addressing the entirety of the Legends.

"So, what? We just go about, business as usual?" Jax asked, crossing his arms.

"Indeed, Mr. Jackson. Gideon, anything?"

" _I have detected an anomaly in the year 1356 in_ _Northern_ _England. It seems there is a band of time pirates in the area._ " Gideon stated.

"Very well. Everyone, strap yourselves in." Rip declared. Everyone took their seat and lowered the harnesses.

"I can't believe it. Medieval era. I've always wanted to be a knight." Ray chuckled as he shook in his seat.

"Dr. Palmer, please try to retain some professionalism." Rip stated coldly.

"… Sorry." Ray shifted in his seat as the Waverider took off and began to enter the time-stream.

"… Business as usual." Rip muttered as his activated the time-warp drive.

 **25 hours later**

The crew of the Waverider returned on board, after successfully stopping the time pirates. Jax and Mick were dressed as servants, Sara was ripping off the extravagant dress she was trapped in, Stein and Rip walked back in as two noblemen, and Ray followed up the rear in full armor with a huge grin on his face.

"Well, that was fun." Ray chimed in, much to everyone's annoyance.

"Yes, well, I think we can all agree that it could've gone better." Stein started.

"Indeed. For example, Ms Lance, was that altercation truly necessary?" Rip snapped at Sara.

"He tried to get me to sleep with him. He earned it." Sara chimed as she shred the last of the dress, in only a corset and pajama-like undergarments.

"I doubt that unwanted flirtation deserves _decapitation_. And Dr Palmer, you will put that sword in the cargo hold. That is a historical object, not a souvenir to put on your wall."

Ray hugged the sword to his chest. "But the king gave it to me." This earned him a stern stare from Rip. "… Okay."

"Also, Mr Jackson and Professor Stein, I commend you both on not merging in the presence of the locals. At least you two didn't mess up." At that, Jax and Stein high-fived and Rip held out his hand in Mick's direction.

"… What?" Mick said innocently, but Rip simply made a "hand it over" motion with his hand, and Mick reached into his pockets and handed Rip a small handful of jewels and gold coins.

"Now then, I suggest we all get some sleep. We have a while before Gideon will detect any new disturbances to the timeline." Rip stated, and everyone headed back to their bunks. Rip just sighed loudly and leaned back against the wall. "Huh... Business as usual."


	2. Not it!

"Alright, someone needs to sweep out the cargo hold. I don't know how that much sand got in there, but it needs to go." Rip demanded at his crew after they had stopped a time aberration in the middle of 1602 in the Sahara Desert. The rest of the Legends were shedding their clothes and deciding on who got first shower.

"Not it." Sara shot out, walking towards the showers.

"Not it." Ray followed up quickly, heading for his room.

"Not it." Jax and Mick snapped, walking away quickly. That left Martin Stein standing alone with a confused and angry look on his face.

"… Really? … Gideon, where's the broom closet?"

" _The second door down the left hallway._ " At that, the professor walked away, grumbling about how a PhD should mean not having to operate a broom.

 **Later:**

The dishes are starting to pile up. On the counter. Because the sink was completely full. The cabinets were close to empty and Rip would not stand for it any longer. He decided to confront them at breakfast.

"Alright, someone needs to handle this." He muttered to the crew as he motioned to the mountain of dishes.

"Not it." Stein and Mick snapped first, speed-walking away, leaving behind their bowls.

"Not it." Sara chimed in, walking by with just a piece of toast in her hand.

"Nope." Jax slid out of his seat, and left Rip and Ray in the dining area.

"… Seriously, guys?" Ray shouted out to them.

"Congrats, Dr. Palmer." Rip patted him on the back, and handed Ray the mug he was drinking from. It was green with a child's hand-print on it. "My son and wife gave me that mug for Father's Day. Do. NOT. Break it." Rip pointed at Ray's face and strided out of the room leaving Ray mortified at the mug in his hands.

 **Later:**

"Do none of you know how to do laundry? It is quite a simple process. Into the wash, into the dryer, put away; SIMPLE! There's no reason for this... this... MOUNTAIN of clothing!" Rip gestured to the enormous pile of dirty, sweaty, and bullet hole-ridden garments.

"Not it." Ray and Stein stated calmly, and walked away.

"Not it." Jax sort of hopped away, eager to go find something to fix on board.

"Not it." Mick walked away, smiling. That left Sara as the last to remain as Rip had already left while nobody noticed.

"Really? Gonna make the woman do the laundry, guys? **Oh, I see how it is!** " She yelled off as she started to sort the clothes.

 **Later:**

The team had just finished up with a band of time pirates in 300 B.C. Rome, and were starving. They had to complete their task quickly, and therefore had needed to skip any meals they would've had that day.

"Dude, I could really go for a pizza right now." Jax said in between breaths, as they had needed to run away from some very angry Roman soldiers.

"I, for one, would prefer a nice bowl of tomato soup." Stein said as he licked his lips.

"Anybody else smell fried chicken right now?" Ray asked, while holding his bruised nose which a legionnaire had punched earlier.

"Very well then, which of you would like to make dinner? Because we are not stopping anywhere for take-out."

"Not it!" Everyone shouted out much to Rip's annoyance. He just sighed and rubbed his forehead.

"Gideon, who said it last?"

" _I believe that would be Mr. Rory._ " At that, everyone but Mick got a horrified look on their face. They all remembered what happened last time Mick cooked. That poor squirrel...

"… Gideon, take us to Central City 2016 and find the nearest Big belly Burger, please."

 **Later:**

"Okay, clearly we need to work out how to do the chores from now on. This whole "not it" thing clearly isn't working. So, Gideon will keep a chore chart for all of you." Rip said cheerfully to the crew.

"So... how do we decide on who fills in the chart?" Ray questioned, and nearly a split second later-

"No-" All but Jax started.

"Don't. Say. IT." Rip growled through gritted teeth. "Don't bloody say it."


	3. Game Night

"Okay, any ideas on what we should do first?" Ray beamed as the Legends looked over the short stack of games they had piled up. It was their second time doing a "game night", and they were all very enthusiastic to get everyone else hooked on their favorite game.

"I vote we do something simple first. Poker, Blackjack, a simple card game to start us off." Stein chimmed in.

"Whoa whoa whoa, no. I remember how good you were at poker in the saloon. You are not hustling me." Jax replied sassily.

"We could do chess first. It's a simple game, easy enough for everyone." Ray said, holding the chessboard in his hands.

"Chess... That the boring one?" Mick grumbled, and Ray slowly put the board down, disappointed.

"How about 'Dominion'? It's a bit tricky to get the hang of, but it's pretty fun." Sara explained, holding up the card game.

"Says on the box, it takes 30 minutes? Yeah, that's a bit much." Jax stated, tapping his fingers on the table.

"And Dungeons and Dragons is any shorter?" Sara replied, looking at Jax's pick.

"What?! Do you know how much work you have to put into making a quest? It's gonna be awesome!"

"For a geek, maybe. I vote we do billiards. We could have Gideon set up a hologram table for it." Mick grinned happily at the thought.

"And get hustled by you and Ms Lance? Forgive me, but no thank you." Stein chimmed in.

"I wouldn't hustle you guys... much." Sara said innocently, avoiding the glares from everyone else.

"How about 'Mousetrap'?" Ray pitched in.

"Way too complicated." Jax replied.

"I for one, think we should at least try Monopoly." Stein added in.

"No!" Everyone went at once, in fear. They all remembered last time they played that. The frustration, the betrayal, the pieces flying everywhere.

"Just a suggestion." Martin put his hands behind his back and looked down at his shoes. "… Candyland?"

"Eh, more of a kid's game." Ray muttered, looking over the colorful box.

"Battleship." Mick grinned cheerfully.

"Maybe... 'Uno'?" Sara commented.

"Nah." Everyone else shot that down.

"Okay, we definitely have to try Pit." Ray stated.

"You mean the market game where we all turn into mad-men yelling '2,2,1,1,3'? Yeah right." Jax rebutted.

"Evening everyone. Have you all decided yet?" Rip asked nonchalantly as he entered the lounge area with his hands behind his back.

"Not yet, I'm afraid. 'Clue' worked last time, but I doubt anyone's in the mood for it again after what happened last time." Stein shuddered.

"I thought as much, which is why I dug this out." Rip tossed a black box onto the table, and everyone looked it over as their captain took a seat.

"Hell yes." Sara grinned from ear to ear and plopped down in her seat.

"Oh, I'm in." Jax rubbed his hands together and sat across form Rip.

"Same here." Mick growled as he took a seat.

"Oh dear." Stein muttered in fear, while Ray just stared at the box in confusion.

"Wait, what's 'Cards Against Humanity'?"


	4. A Day at the Carnival

The Waverider landed in the far left of an empty field next to a tree line. Rip started to get up and felt woozy.

"Woo. Vertigo. Been a while since I felt that." He walked slowly forward like a guy just getting a hangover.

"¿Alguien más huele a pollo?" Ray muttered and then got a horrified look. "¿Qué mierda?"

"It seems Dr. Palmer is suffering from Linguistic Dysplasia." Stein pointed out, and slowly got out of his seat. "...I can't feel my left foot."

"Numbness in certain limbs. Anyone else experiencing-" Rip started, only to be cut off by Sara and Jax falling out of their seats. "Ah. Temporary paralysis."

"… Why can't I see?" Mick wondered as he held his hands out, trying to orient himself.

"Not to worry everyone, the side effects should pass shortly. Now then. This is Pollock, Louisiana, the year 1956. Gideon detected a time aberration which will most likely destroy the town and surrounding areas." Rip explained to the rest of the crew.

"So, how bad are we talking?" Sara grunted, as she regained her balance.

" _I have calculated a 85% chance of a secret nuclear testing bunker being destroyed due to an explosion._ " Gideon stated, and everyone got worried.

"Alright. Mr Jefferson and Professor Stein, I trust you can handle dismantling the nuclear devices. Everyone else, we will evacuate the others in the facility should there be an explosion, nuclear or otherwise." Rip stated the plan, and they all went off to the exit. As they walked away, Rip cloaked the ship and locked it down. And as they were walking away, none of them noticed a series of vans and trucks pulling up in the field.

 **3.5 hours later:**

"Well, that was easy. Thanks to Stein, we didn't even need to evacuate." Ray smiled as he kept flipping a coin from the lab.

"Indeed. With my input on the research they were doing, a violent eruption or detonation should never happen." Stein cheered, walking contently.

"Not to mention you did just help the U.S. create a more powerful nuclear warhead. You made history, Gray." Jax high-fived his partner, and the rest of them chuckled.

"Indeed. It seems today was a true success. Now then, let's-" Rip stopped suddenly when they got to the field.

"Whoa." Ray exclaimed.

"Oh boy." Stein added on.

"Damn." Mick growled.

"Oh, awesome." Jax and Sara both chimed in.

"Bloody Hell... a Carnival." Rip muttered as he gazed upon the booths and rides that had been set up mere feet away from his ship. "Perfect. NOW, we can't get on board, and what's more, we can't leave. Not without risking substantial damage to the timeline by having a hundred people see a time-ship." He put his face in his hands and groaned.

"… Anybody up for the roller coaster?" Sara beamed as everyone else looked at her. "What? We got nothing better to do. Besides, I got enough." She reached into her and pulled out a wad of bills from the 1950's.

"Ms Lance, do you always pilfer the currency fabricator?" Rip complained, unnerved by the amount she had.

"Pretty much. Come on, let's have a little fun." She walked off smiling and headed to the fairgrounds. Everyone else debated it for a moment before following after her. They were quickly taken in by the ambiance of the place, and found themselves enjoying the atmosphere.

"You know, every time the carnival came to Central City, my mom would take me and a few of my friends. It was some of the best times I ever had." Jax reminisced as he walked by booths filled with food and sweets.

"I remember the first time I went to one of these. I was 16, trying to show my girlfriend I could have a good time. Not be the stuck-up student I always was. She told me she had more fun that night than any other." Stein recalled to the group, walking past the tents.

"Okay, I got us all five tickets and everyone gets 10 extra dollars." Sara handed out the tickets and cash to the Legends. They all started calculating what they did and didn't want to do. "See you boys. I am headed to the roller coaster."

"Oh, wait for me." Ray walked off with her, grinning like an idiot.

"If you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go try the ring toss." Mick stated as the others looked at him in confusion.

"I think I'm gonna go try to land someone in the dunk-tank. What about you, Gray?" Jax stated.

"I believe I'll try the Ferris Wheel. And you, captain?" Stein pondered to Rip.

"Never one for carnivals myself. And being a former Time Master, I sort of despise them. They're worse than aberrations, showing up whenever wherever. And you run the risk of being spotted if you are anywhere near one. Also, in the 2150 era, these events are extremely scarce. I never actually saw one myself until I owned the Waverider." Rip explained.

"Well, I apologize that you never got to experience a unique place like this as a child. Still, perhaps you can still enjoy yourself." Stein patted Rip on the back as he walked off. Rip simply looked around for anything he could call amusing and spotted a water pistol game. He walked towards it and hoped the team was enjoying themselves.

"Woohoo! You okay there, Palmer?" Sara yelped as she and Ray departed the coaster, Ray looking a bit wobbly.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just haven't done one of those in a while. Woo." Ray chuckled as they headed to a dart game. "Oh cool. You know, I was really good at darts as a kid. I could hit the bulls-eye 9 out of 10 times."

"Wow. Impressive. Think you can handle this?" Sara asked as they got to the booth, and Ray put down a ticket.

"I think I got it." Ray got handed three darts and tossed the first one, only to see it bounce off a yellow balloon. "… That was, a... just a warm-up." Ray tossed the second one, with the same result.

"Little rusty?"

"No, no. I got it." Ray chuckled as he picked up the last dart and made a quick calculation on how to hit it and the throw he should use. He tossed it and it landed right between two balloons, not popping either one. "Maybe a little rusty."

"Just a little." Sara agreed, as she put down one of her tickets and as soon as she got the darts, she tossed them all at once, popping three balloons. She grinned smugly as she was handed a small stuffed bear.

"… Yeah, well... I can shrink." Ray muttered and walked off to another booth as Sara just grinned after him.

At the dunk tank, Jax was struggling to hit make the right hit. "Come on, come on." He muttered as he threw another ball and missed yet again.

"Trouble, Jefferson?" Stein startled Jax as he appeared beside him.

"Just a problem with the angle." Jax muttered as he took the second to last ball and aimed it.

"Perhaps you should try to lower your arm a bit and release at this point." Stein explained, showing how he would throw.

"Gray, I played football all through high school. I got this." Jax tossed the ball, only to have it bounce off. Stein took the last one and did a quick calculation. He then tossed the ball and made a bulls-eye, making the guy in the tank fall in the water.

"You played football. I studied physics." Stein walked away with a smug grin leaving a confused Jax just standing there.

Well, how did everyone else fare?" Rip asked the rest of them when they all met up a few minutes later. "And where is Mr. Rory?"

"Hey guys." Mick announced himself while holding a giant stuffed bear in one hand and a leg of chicken in the other. "… I was really good at the ring toss as a kid. Did the same thing with beer caps and a trash can the rest of my life."

"… Fascinating. Now then, shall we go somewhere else for dinner or remain here?" Rip asked the others.

"I'm good with here. They got hot dogs and funnel cake back that way." Jax pointed off to the right.

"Ooh. Funnel Cake." Ray looked eagerly to where Jax had pointed, heading that way with Jax.

"I'm good with here too. I could go for some fried chicken." Sara chimed in and walked off towards the booth selling it.

"I think I'll try some of the corn on the cob. Don't want to indulge in too much rich foods." Stein walked off, leaving Rip and Mick standing alone.

"Very well then. I think I'll go try the … 'corndogs' I believe they're called." Rip walked off as well, leaving Mick with his half-eaten chicken leg.

"…. Guess I'll get another set of legs."

 **30 minutes later:**

"Alright, quickly now." Rip motioned for the others to proceed inside the Waverider's entrance. He had waited until none of the locals would notice their disappearance. As the last of them entered, he climbed in and shut the door.

"Well, that was fun. Nice to have a day to just goof off." Sara commented, leaning against a wall.

"True, but in the future, we must be more careful about where we land. Gideon, any new time disturbances?"

" _None that I can detect, Captain._ " Gideon replied, and the rest of the Legends all sighed in relief.

"Well, I'm going to bed. I am exhausted." Jax informed the group, and he walked off to the bunks.

"Same here. I wanna cuddle with this guy." Sara sighed as she hugged the bear she won earlier.

"I kinda want to see what this tub can catch on TV." Mick walked off to the lounge, and Stein and Ray turned to Rip.

"We'll be turning in as well. Good night, Captain." Stein nodded to Rip and he and Ray walked off to the bunks.

"Good night." Rip called after them, and he made his way to his study. He sat back in his chair and pulled out a small stuffed rabbit he won earlier from his coat pocket. He turned it over in his hands and finally got up. Opening up a small closet, he put the toy right next to an old photo of his family. He shut the closet and walked off to his own bunk.


	5. Ground Rules, New Rules, Rip's Rules

"All right, clearly we need to set some ground rules. These shenanigans of yours have got to stop. Or be toned down, at the very least." Rip stood before the rest of the crew who were all standing around trying to act innocent.

"First off, and this should go without saying, but since it's you all, I'm going to say it anyway. NO DISTURBING THE TIMELINE." Rip scolded the crew, and they all kinda jumped at his volume.

"Secondly, never must you take future tech with you in an era previous to 2016.

"Third, you will all register with Gideon if and when you use the Jumpship. I will authorize small trips to a store or restaurant, but no going anywhere dangerous." Everyone agreed with that after a while.

"Finally, you will all try to act with professionalism and decorum while on missions." Rip finished off as the others simply stood around agreeing to what he had just said. "Now then, good night."

 **Later:**

"… Why?" Rip asked as he watched Ray and Jax were making sandwiches with a couple of Sara's throwing knives.

"… All the regular knives are in the dishwasher." Ray pointed to the device behind him that was humming and shaking slightly.

"Put those away before Ms Lance finds out that you-"

"Hey guys... The rest of the knives dirty again?" Sara asked, matter-of-factly as she started to use another of her knives to make her own lunch.

"… New rule: no using weaponry as cutlery." Rip stated, while he saw Jax using the knife to remove something from his teeth. "… Or as toothpicks." Rip added on, as he walked out.

"… Should we have told him about the throwing knives we already put in the dishwasher?" Ray pointed out.

"Nah. What he doesn't know won't hurt him." Sara chimed, and sat down to enjoy her lunch when-

"TAKE THEM OUT!" Rip called out from down in the study.

"… Gideon snitched on us." Jax muttered.

" _Apologies, Mr Jackson._ "

 **Later:**

Rip just stood at the door with his arms crossed as the smoke flowed out of the cargo hold. After a while, it cleared away to reveal Firestorm, who was shuffling his feet. In a flash, Firestorm separated into Stein and Jax.

"Do I even want to know why you nearly blew up my ship?" Rip scolded the pair of combustible heroes.

"That would be my fault. I wanted to try out our transmutation abilities, and thought we could try it on something small, like a piece of carbon into water. However, I got a bit hasty and we ended up making hydrogen gas instead." Stein explained.

"Which is highly flammable, and since you two are on fire, it... I get it." Rip sighed in exhaustion, and just threw his hands in the air. "New rule: no doing experiments using superpowers on the ship. Or experiments of any kind." He then walked off.

 **Later:**

"I don't care who put them on board, I don't care where you got them, but I will say this. New rule: absolutely no more... FURBY DOLLS on board my ship." Rip threw the creepy toy to the floor and stormed off, leaving the crew looked at each other in confusion.

 **Later:**

The Legends all limped back into the ship after their last mission. Sara had minor bruises, Jax and Stein simply ached, and Mick and Ray were carrying Rip in. The captain himself had a black eye, two bruises on each limb, an aching chest, and a stab wound in his lower right leg.

"… New... rule... No... More... BAR FIGHTS!" Rip shouted, as he was dropped into a med-bay chair.

"… Agreed." Stein muttered, and everyone else left for their bunks to let Rip recover.

 **Later:**

"Man, that was awesome, we have got to do that again some-" Jax stopped when he noticed Rip in his bunk. "Heeeey Rip... wassup?" Jax tried to play it cool.

"Mr Jackson, can you explain where you were or what you're wearing?" Rip motioned to Jax's apparently custom made cosplay of Natsu Dragneel from "Fairy Tail". Jax had on it and a badge that said "Nekocon" on it. Jax sorta shrugged.

"I was, uh... at a... stakeout. Looking for potential aberrations... Nothing to report. All clear for this area.." Jax muttered as he tried to remain as calm as possible.

"So, you weren't at a convention among thousands of people, wearing an outfit clearly made by the Waverider's fabricator?"

"… Gideon told you, didn't she?" Jax replied, realizing how deep in he was.

"Yes. New rule: no going to conventions or using the fabricator for cosplays." Jax nodded quickly and Rip walked out. Jax opened up his closet and put his outfit in their with his several other costumes he had the fabricator create.

 **Later:**

Stein and Mick were just walking back onto the ship when they passed by Rip.

"Oh, Mr Rory, Professor Stein. Where were you two?" He asked them, and they both got concerned looks on their faces.

"Oh, you know, just enjoying the local delicacies." Mick rambled off, trying to look collected.

"… This is 1956 Chicago... There are no delicacies." At that, Rip noticed a piece of paper in Stein's pocket. "What's that?"

"Hmm? Oh, that. Just, uh- a bit of spare money we had from the currency fabricator." Martin explained as he showed Rip the bills\\.

"That bill is at least a week old. We don't keep old money on board." At that, the pair got wide-eyed and panicky. Stein started to talk when a wad of bills fell out of his pocket.

"...Well, we might have engaged in... just a few friendly, pointless wagers with some of the locals." Stein explained.

"What kind of wagers? And how did you win that much money?" Rip growled out.

"… We may have used the time data-banks to... learn how some sports games were going to play out... And a few horse races." Stein explained to the now red-faced captain. Mick just stood there silently.

"… New. Rule... No using future data to gamble." Rip growled through clenched teeth as he walked off to the bridge.

"… Well, there goes the two grand we would've made from next week's game." Mick mumbled and walked off, leaving an embarrassed Stein in the hallway.

 **Hey guys, Operative18 here. Quick question for you guys. I'm planning on doing a Legends Christmas fic. Just wanted your opinion. Should I do it in this one as two separate chapters or just make it a whole new story? Let me know soon cause I really wanna do it soon.**


	6. O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

Rip walked into his study like it was any other day and plopped down in his seat. He looked over some data from the time-line, trying to determine the team's next mission. And then he felt like something was off. He looked to his right and saw something huge standing in the corner. It loomed over him and looked a bit unstable.

"Gideon, where did that come from?"

" _I believe Ms. Lance placed it in here earlier today._ " Rip sighed and pressed the intercom.

"Ms. Lance, could you please meet me in the study?" He sat back down and waited. Sara came walking around the corner and leaned against the doorway.

"What's up?" Sara asked innocently, much to Rip's annoyance.

"What is that?" Rip pointed to the towering object in the corner.

"… Do you not know what a Christmas tree looks like?" Sara mocked, looking at the tall artificial evergreen pine that was currently bare and wobbling in its make-shift stand of a pot and a couple throwing knives.

"… Allow me to rephrase: why is it in here?" Rip put his hands down on the desk in exhaustion.

"We've been doing this for a while, and I realized that we missed a few holidays. And I decided we needed to celebrate one of them. That's why." Sara pointed out.

"And you chose Christmas... You do realize we can go to any holiday in any time or-"

" **NO.** " Sara growled out. "This is for the rest of us. It's our Christmas. No going anywhere or when to do it. Just the Waverider and its crew." She finished as Rip sat slightly scared of her outburst.

"… Very well. We'll celebrate Christmas on board." Rip agreed, and Sara walked off to tell the rest of the team of their holiday plans.

"… These people are going to kill me one of these days."

 **Later:**

"Okay, this bulb needs replacing." Ray took a green light-bulb out of the tree lights and grabbed a spare from the box the crew got from the store earlier. Ray and Sara were stringing the lights while Stein was helping to fluff out the branches and Jax was setting out the ornaments and putting hooks on them.

"This branch refuses to cooperate. It won't- ugh!" Stein groaned as he kept trying to fluff the same branch over and over to no avail.

"Gray, just move on to a different one." Jax insisted, putting a small Santa ornament on one of the branches.

"Hey guys. Found one!" Mick hollered as he walked in with an actual store bought tree stand. The arsonist lifted up the tree to replace the one they had now.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Easy." Jax stood close to the tree to make sure it didn't fall over.

"Relax, kid. I got this." Mick muttered as he put the tree in the new stand and tightened the screws. The tree stood straight and Mick got out from under it. "… Looks good."

"Yeah, it does." Sara added on, stringing some more lights on the branches. "I loved decorating the tree as a kid. Always made me feel like I was adding my own touch to the holiday, you know?"

"That makes sense. I mean, your birthday is actually Christmas." Ray chuckled. "I was always good at getting the lights and decorations perfectly spaced from each other. Drove mom nuts."

"I remember when Clarissa and I first celebrated Christmas together. We decorated the tree while talking about the science of Santa Claus. I still say that he can't accomplish that task of his." Stein reminisced.

"Really? The 'science of Santa'? Yeah, sounds festive." Sara joked as she and Ray finished stringing the lights on the tree.

"In order to accomplish his goal, Santa would need to go inside, leave the gifts, consume the snacks left for him, get back up the chimney and into the sleigh and move onto the next house in 1/1000th of a second." Stein rambled on.

"Yeah... but Santa's magic." Ray added on as he now helped to put on ornaments.

"That's what Clarissa said." Stein muttered as he put some candy canes on the tree.

 **Later:**

"Well everyone, how's it coming?" Rip asked as he entered the study.

"Almost finished. We wanted you to put the star on top." Sara handed him an expensive looking crystal star with five points on it.

"Um… Thank you. That's very- wait, where did you get this?!" Rip scolded at them.

"… Uh..." Everyone said in unison.

"Please tell me you didn't steal this."

"Technically, we did, but we fixed a time aberration in doing so. That is the Lost Star." Sara pointed out.

"It was stolen by thieves in 1850 London from a very lucrative family. It was supposed to be sold on the black market, but according to history before the aberration, it was simply lost." Stein explained and Rip looked at the star in his hands.

"So we just decided to snatch it. History won't miss it, so why not?" Mick stated, and Rip held the star in both hands.

"… Very well. To history being protected, and to the spirit of the season." Rip laughed as he put the star on top. It shone brightly and gave off beautiful reflections of its points.

"Merry Christmas, indeed." Stein smiled.

"Okay, you guys know what comes next." Sara giggled, and everyone else looked at her in confusion. "… Secret Santa!" At that, everyone else got excited and ran off, leaving Rip there looking terrified.

"… These people are definitely going to kill me one of these days."


	7. Deck the Halls and Burn Down the Kitchen

Rip was pinned down under fire behind a wall of barrels. He had tracked down the time pirate to 1834 in a small town outside of Kentucky. The locals were all forced into helping him find a rare element that wouldn't be discovered for another 300 years. Rip waited until he heard silence, then came out from behind the barrels and fired into the time pirate's shoulder and leg. As he went down, Rip walked over to him.

"Any last words?" Rip asked as he clocked his revolver and held it to the pirate's face.

" _ **… I DON'T WANT A LOT FOR CHRISTMAS-**_ " Rip bolted awake at the sound. He was back on the Waverider in his bunk, and he WAS sleeping. And the song was still playing over the intercoms.

"Gideon, what the hell is going on?" Rip demanded as he fumbled out of bed.

" _Ms Lance asked me to broadcast a 'playlist' of 'holiday' songs._ " Gideon reported as Rip pulled on a fresh change of clothes.

"Why this early?! Who else was asleep?" Rip muttered as he pulled on his boots.

" _Actually, it appears you overslept Captain._ " Rip got confused at that, seeing as how he was normally the first one awake. He walked out of his bunk and continued to the bridge in a somewhat annoyed mood. At then he noticed it. The halls were covered with Garland, lights, and giant plastic candy canes and wreaths. Rip just stared at it all for a moment before continuing down the hall. He got the bridge and found Sara and Ray hanging a giant wreath just above the study doorway.

"… Ms Lance, Dr. Palmer... What have you done to my ship's walls?" Rip asked bluntly, causing them to turn around.

"Oh hey, Rip. We just decided to make the ship a bit more festive. You like it?" Sara asked as she put a candy cane into Rip's coat pocket.

"… I don't dislike it. I would've appreciated a bit of warning beforehand, though." Rip scolded both of them, and Ray and Sara both nodded in agreement.

"We'll let you know next time." Ray grinned as he finished plugging in a strand of blinking lights. Rip just sighed and walked off.

"Where you going, Rip?"

"Back to bed."

 **Later:**

Professor Stein walked into the kitchen while reading a paper on a new scientific breakthrough from 2016 and stopped when he saw the cooking items. And what was even more disturbing, Jax in a red and green apron.

"Jefferson, what exactly are you doing in here?" Stein asked while looking over the baking items.

"Oh, Gray. Hey, could you help me? I need someone to read off the directions for me. It's gonna make my job a lot easier." Jax pointed to a cookbook as he looked over the measuring cups and spoons.

"… Oh, chocolate chip cookies. How festive. Where'd you get this cookbook?" Stein looked over the old-style book.

"Oh, I snagged it from my mom's on our last meal run to Central City 2016." Jax explained.

"… I see. All right... ' _Cream ½ cup butter, ½ cup granulated sugar, and ½ cup brown sugar together'_." Stein read out as Jax pulled all the items together.

"Got it, what next?"

" ' _Add 1 egg, 1 tablespoon hot water, and 1 tablespoon vanilla together and beat until fluffy_ '." After that was done, Stein got out a different mixing bowl.

"What's that for?" Jax asked to his cooking partner.

"It says here we need to ' _sift 1 ¾ cups flour, ½ tablespoon salt, ½_ _tablespoon_ _baking soda_ ' in a different bowl and then add the dry ingredients in with the first bowl." Stein explained as the duo kept up with their task.

"Okay, both bowls added, now what?"

"Let's see... ' _After adding both bowls, beat until smooth. Add one 7 ounce package of chocolate chips into mixture and beat again_ '." Stein read out as Jax added in the chocolate chips. Once the dough was ready, they each grabbed a baking sheet and started to scoop out the dough. Stein turned to the oven and set it to 375 degrees.

"Okay, so they should take about 10 minutes." Stein explained as he grabbed one of the sheets. At that point, Jax grabbed his hand.

"Wait, Gray, why use the oven?" Jax asked, leaving Stein looking confused.

"How use are we going to bake-" Stein started as he noticed Jax's huge grin. "… Are you honestly suggesting we merge and use our fire powers to COOK? We could destroy the ship!" Stein nagged at him. Stein opened the oven and put his tray in.

"… Only one way to find out." At that, Jax smacked him on the shoulder and merged with Stein into Firestorm.

" _Jefferson, you idiot! Don't you-_ " Stein yelled telepathically, until Jax shot flames over his bake sheet for about three seconds. Once he stopped, the cookies were nice round and goldish-brown. The superhero separated and Stein looked at the sheet and Jax in total disbelief.

"You do realize that we could've... You reckless-" Stein was cut off with Jax stuffing a cookie into his mouth. Stein bit off what was shoved inside and held the bit that was hanging outside of his lips. "… That's... actually pretty good." He ate the rest of the cookie and looked around to see a few kitchen items on fire.

"Oh shit!" Jax yelled out and grabbed the extinguisher, putting out the flames. He breathed out and noticed something burnt on the counter. He picked it up to see it was his mother's cookbook. "… Oh hell." At that, the book slipped through his fingers and fell to the floor, breaking apart into ash when it hit.

"… We could always get a replacement from a bookstore in the past." Stein chimed in, and Jax felt slightly better


	8. Secret Santa

Sara walked into Rip's study with a smile on her face and a Santa hat in her hands. She plopped it down right in front of Rip.

"… And this is for?" Rip groaned as he picked up the festive hat.

"Secret Santa. We all pick a name, and whoever you get, you buy something for that person." Sara explained, and she held open the hat for Rip. Reluctantly, he sighed and put his hand in, pulling out a slip of paper.

"It says-"

"No, no. Don't say it. That's where the 'secret' part comes in. And don't try to ask your person what they might want." Sara snapped as she walked off, and Rip looked at the name in his hands: 'Stein'.

"Okay then, what does the Professor like?" Rip muttered to himself as he leaned back in his chair.

 **Later:**

"Jefferson? You in here?" Stein walked into the Engine Room and saw Jax working on one of the propulsion units.

"What's up, Gray? You okay?" Jax smiled as he put down the tools he was holding.

"Not really. I got confused earlier, while I was re-reading an old paper of mine, and then I realized that maybe you were the one confused. Are you alright?" Stein explained, as Jax looked a bit worried.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm good, just a little unsure what to get for my Secret Santa." Jax explained as he looked over his handiwork, seeing it was good enough.

"Oh, I see. Well, perhaps I can help. Who did you receive?" Stein grinned, confident he could be of use.

"Gray, I can't tell you that!" Jax replied as he picked up the toolbox and walked to the door.

"Why not? I could be of great help." Stein added as they exited the engine room.

"Because you might let it set and tell her." Jax scolded.

"… 'Her'. So, it's Ms Lance?" Stein remarked, and Jax looked defeated. "What to get for a former assassin who died and was brought back to life... Certainly a conundrum."

"Fine, who did you get? Fair's fair. Let me help you." Jax asked bluntly, and Stein just sighed. "I can find out myself. Link goes both ways."

"Jefferson, I have spent years studying the effects of brainwaves. If you think you can just reach in and see who-"

"You got Ray."

"How did you do that?" Stein muttered, and the pair walked off.

"… Get him a Nerf six-shooter. He loves the Old West." Jax patted Stein on the back.

"… He had a REAL six-shooter when we WENT to the Old West."

"… Yeah, this is gonna be tough."

 **Later:**

Ray and Mick were fixing up their gear in the cargo hold. Ray was holding one of his wrist gauntlets in one hand and a pair of screwdrivers in the other. Mick was just cleaning the outside of the flame-gun lazily.

"Hey, hand me the pliers, would you?" Ray asked, and Mick just handed him the first tool he put his hand on. "Uh, that's a... that's a hammer... You okay?" Ray put down the tools and started to reassemble his suit.

"It's blondie's little Santa thing. Got me a bit testy." Mick finished cleaning the gun and put it away.

"… I take it you don't like Christmas?" Ray asked, reconnecting all the bits and pieces of his suit

"Oh, no, I love it. All those gifts just sitting there under the tree for anyone to grab. It's lovely." Mick grinned, leaving Ray looking rather scared. "Just don't know what I'm supposed to get for the kid."

"… I'm sure you'll think of something. My gift isn't gonna be easy either... Wait, 'kid'? You got Jax?"

"Yep. You?" Mick nonchalantly muttered while grabbing a beer and popped it open.

"Oh, I got Rip... And I probably shouldn't have said that." Ray sighed as he put away his tools.

"Wanna go shopping for the guys? Got plenty of time." Mick growled as he headed for the Jumpship. Ray followed and they met up with Jax and Stein in the hallway.

"Oh, hey guys. We were just going to go shopping for the 'Secret Santa'." Jax explained to the pair.

"Oh, uh, so... so were we." Ray mumbled out and the group got slightly nervous around each other. And then Rip and Sara came around the corner.

"… I assume we're all headed for the Jumpship for the gift exchange?" Rip asked, and everyone else just nodded. Rip just sighed in exhaustion. "Gideon, set course for Central City, 2016." Rip commanded and walked to the bridge, everyone else in tow.

 **3.5 hours later:**

Everyone walked back aboard the Waverider with bags in hand, full of groceries and other personal items to hide their gifts. They all went to their bunks and hid the item for the exchange, and returned to sort out the rest of their items.

"Alright, everyone gets a half hour to put the gifts under the tree. Go!" Sara shouted put, and everyone ran to go wrap up their gift. Gideon arranged it so that the doors couldn't be opened when one person was placing a gift so the mystery could remain. Stein finished first, then Jax, Mick, Rip, Ray, and Sara finished up the rest.

 **Later:**

"Okay, let's draw numbers, and you receive the gift for you in that order." Sara passed around a hat and everyone picked a number. "Okay, who's number 1?"

"That would be me." Rip stated, and he headed for the tree and grabbed a box wrapped in silver and red. "Hmm. Festive" He ripped it open and held up a pocket watch. It was old-fashioned and dirty from years of wear and tear. "Wow. It's very nice. Who was-"

"Me. I saw it at an antiques store. I had Gideon run a test on it... Jonah Hex had it once." Ray explained, and Rip rubbed over the watch.

"… Thank you, Dr. Palmer... Anyway, who's next?"

"That would be me, I believe." Stein explained, and he grabbed a rectangular box with gold and silver snowflake wrapping paper. He opened it up to reveal a strange outfit that looked like it was outer space. "An authentic 'Space Ranger' uniform. Who managed to find this?"

"Me, actually. I located a novelty costume store, and asked Gideon to help me make the other part." Rip pointed to the box, and Stein lifted up the costume to reveal a gold badge that read 'Martin Stein, Commander'. Stein got a little teary-eyed at that and set the gift down to shake Rip's hand.

"Thank you Captain." He sighed and motioned to the tree. "Who's next?"

"Meeee." Sara sang, and she walked over to see a small green box with her name on it. She tore it open and just froze. She slowly pulled out a framed photo of her, Oliver Queen and her sister, Laurel. It was from years ago, before the boat crash that changed all three of their lives. Jax came over and rubbed her shoulders.

"Your friend Thea had it. I explained what we were doing to Oliver and the group, and she gave it to me. I changed the frame, though." Jax explained, as Sara got misty-eyed. She turned and bear-hugged him, who rubbed her back. "… Who's next?"

"Then it's my turn." Ray grabbed a tall box with blue and gray paper. He tore it open and looked inside. "Okay, very funny." He turned it over on the study's desk and a huge stack of John Wayne movies spilled out. "Because I said I was... in the- I get it."

"I have to admit, finding all of his western films was quite tedious, Dr. Palmer." Stein commented, smiling at his little gag-gift. "Next?"

"That's me." Jax squirmed out of Sara's hug and headed over to the tree, and pulled out a rather poorly wrapped oval-shaped gift. He tore it open and held it up. It was a football jersey that said "Jackson" on it. "… This is my old high school jersey... that was in my room..." At that, everyone stared at Mick.

"What? I thought he might like it." Mick grumbled, and then reached into his pocket and pulled out some cash. "Here, buy yourself something nice." Mick grumbled, and then stood up. "Guess I'm the last one."

"Yep. Here." Sara handed him a white and blue wrapped box, and Mick ripped the paper off. He froze, seeing what it was. "I thought you might want to have him close to you."

"… Thanks, blondie." Mick sniffed back a tear as he took off the remaining paper, revealing an action figure of Captain Cold. He held it close to his chest. "It's perfect."

"… Merry Christmas, everyone." Stein grinned as he held up a tray of mugs filled with hot chocolate.

"Indeed. Merry Christmas." Rip agreed, and the rest of them all grabbed a mug, and Mick raised his high.

" _ **Merry Christmas, ya**_ _ **filthy**_ _ **animal**_!" He bellowed out, and everyone lost it at that.


End file.
